Letter 4

Date: August 10, 2012
Area: MTC
Companion: Hermana Kidd & Hodgson

Hola familia!    I am short on time as always.  They only give us 30 mins from the time we log into our email to the time we need to be off so that is why I am always rushed, in case you were wondering. So sorry! And yes I found out there is no sending pictures in the MTC. No bueno. I am sorry! I will keep taking them though and send them to you when I am in the field. ASAP. Because I have some good ones! And you don’t even know what my companions or district look like. Let me tell you, they are a good looking bunch of people. Haha! I miss you family! There have been many amazing things that have happened to me this week and I have been really blessed. All of the computers keep freezing today so that is a bummer, but I will try to type as much as I can before it freezes again.

So two things happened this week and I just felt the love of the Lord in my life. I wrote in my last email that I was feeling sick and…it got worse that weekend. It was bad. I woke up Sunday feeling really terrible (just a cold/sore throat/runny nose BUT with no time to rest I was starting to feel worse). I asked my district leader Elder Welker for a blessing Sunday morning (I was also fasting and it was something I really wanted/needed to fast for) so that I could make it to dinner. I really felt like I was going to pass out from exhaustion/lack of sleep/being sick (the thing that made me tired was coughing all night so I only got a few hrs of sleep for a few nights in a row). So all of the Elders in my district were able to give me a blessing and let me tell you the power of the Priesthood is SO REAL. I have a testimony of it. When Elder Welker gave me the blessing I really felt like it was the voice of God and not the voice of a 19 year old Elder. In the blessing he told me that Heavenly Father was pleased with my decision to serve and that it was right for me to be here. He also blessed me that my family and those I love (YOU!) would be protected and safe while I was gone. Not only would you be safe, but you would grow closer together and be incredibly blessed while I am here serving. I KNEW that was true and I was so grateful. Elder Welker also blessed me that I would be able to touch the lives of many while I was here on my mission, and he mentioned investigators, members, and companions. How HUMBLING. It was such a beautiful blessing and I had a few tears at the end because I knew the words were true. It was so powerful to have all the Elders give me a blessing. Afterward I felt so much better physically (like really 100% better) and emotionally comforted. Sunday was a great day and I had the energy I needed to keep fasting. It was SUCH a blessing. Wow. It reminded me of my Patriarchal Blessing where it says that I will be able to be healed physically, spiritually &emotionally through the Priesthood. It’s power is real.

The other thing that happened this week was last night. Our teacher from Spain, Hermana Millan, pulled me out of class just so she could talk to me. She does this with all of the people from our class just to see how we are all doing. Hermana Millan has the GIFT of discernment, she is really incredible. We were talking and she asked me what some of my struggles were. It was actually hard to think of struggles at first because I really do love being here and being a missionary. I told her probably one of the harder things for me here is just being tired in the afternoonss, especially when my companion Hermana Kidd has SO MUCH energy all the time. Haha. (Hermana Hodgson is more calm in her personality, like me). One thing she said that she percieved about me is that I have a lot of love to give but that I have a difficult time expressing that love to others. I said HOW DID YOU KNOW THAT? That is straight out of my Patriarchal Blessing (again). She just said she could see that I want to express that love and encouraged me to find a way (MY way) of expressing that love. What is holding me back? In my blessing it says that I need to be blessed with the ability to express my love properly to others and that as I do so, love will return. I hope this is not sharing to much but I feel impressed to share this experience in its fullness.
Hermana Millan said that she also struggled with this on her mission (that was hard for me to believe, haha) and she had to find out what was holding her back. It was humbling. So, I am on a quest to find out why it is difficult to express my love (specifically to people I do not know very well). She told me I just need to BOOM let it flow. And then I will be a successful missionary. I said okay. I will do that. She really has the spiritual gift to be able to read others. It really helped me and I know that this is something I can work on. Hermana Millan also told me that she felt like she didn’t need to help me with anything but this one thing (she was really kind in complimenting me on my Spanish and was surprised when I told her I didn’t know any Spanish when I opened my call… I am actually really surprised myself when I think about that haha and I feel SO incredibly blessed). After we talked for about 20 mins, we prayed together. It was a really spiritual experience for me and I know there are things I can work on in my character and showing love to others because showing love for investigators is SO essential in missionary work, no matter how good my Spanish is. Good Spanish does not convert people to the gospel, love and a witness fromt the Spirit do so those are the things I am seeking after.

         Well there are lots of things I want to tell you but my time is already out!!! Dad, thank you for sending me all of the letters you did this week. I LOVED the scriptures you sent me they were very uplifting. Keep sending them to me! I especially loved the ones in Corinthians you sent me (I think thats where it was from). I hope you and Ellebelle got home safely! Sounds like you will be busy this weekend. OH Chloe sent me a dearelder package this week it was SO SWEET. I always feel so touched when people send me things. The Arbons also sent me a package and a letter it was so nice! I don’t remember if that was this week or last week, actually. It’s truly a timewarp here. Haha. Grandma and Grandpa wrote me also, I loved reading their letters. Mama Ruesch also sent me a dearelder. I feel SO MUCH LOVE and support from
people back home. I am trying to think if anyone else wrote me. I always love reading dear elders at the end of the day. Even more so than handwritten letters!!!! Haha. Colin and Abs I hope you are doing well! I didn’t hear from you this week but I can assume you are doing awesome things. Colin I hope work is still going well keep at it! I know that schedule and it’s tiring for sure but it’s worth it to learn how to work hard. It’ll help you for a mission I promise. Love you too Mama! Thanksthe packages and letters you sent. I hope I covered all the things you wanted me to this week. Haha. I love and miss all of you so much!
Serving a mission is one of the best decisions I have made because I just feel such desire to help and serve others during this time. I have been so BLESSED and my own conversion process is taking place here. These things are TRUE. The gospel is real and it can change hearts and minds. Read JSH 1 and 3 Ne. and Alma 32 if you doubt these things. Faith is a continual process that just grows every day if you allow it to. When the Spirit of gospel pierces someone’s heart they cannot deny it’s truth! I know this because….it happens to me every day.
I love the gospel. I love you family! I hope you are blessed while I am here. I
love serving! Miss you all. Les amo muchoooooooooo!

Con amor,  Hermana White/Aud

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